Ask An Expert: Decision Maker Fatigue

Q: How do you push through decision fatigue without completely burning out?

I never thought decision fatigue would hit me this hard but I am stuck, exhausted, and second-guessing every decision I make.

As a decision maker, I feel as though every little thing falls on me. Which feature should we prioritize, should I do this full time? Should I bring in a freelancer or wait? Is this marketing strategy the right move? It doesn’t end. The more I overthink, the harder it gets to make a decision.

I used to be excited about this job, but now even small choices feel like a weight on my chest. I know I need to trust my gut more, maybe even delegate, but letting go feels like another impossible decision. Has anyone else struggled with this?

Sound familiar?

A: Everyone struggles with this to varying degrees, so that answers question one. Question two, a little more complex. Because of your description, we know what "burning out" means to you, generally, so thank you for that excellent information.

I have a pretty strong understanding as to what you're going through and while I don't purport to have any secret ideas or shortcuts, my philosophy in life, and by extension work, is founded on the way that I redefined my decision making principles first. Then I looked at the process itself. Now I can say, with a straight face, that I'm always exactly where I want to be.

The gist of my advice is as follows. Take a look at how you define these four things: Help, Time, Outcome, Actions.

What I've found with people who are stuck or are in this kind of "decision quicksand" is that they often start out with a mentality that they feel as though they’re doing something on their own. In your case, this is outlined by the statement "every little thing falls on me". This leads to a more closed off approach, you get in the habit of missing feedback and "help" early on. This is not a criticism, it's a human condition. The majority of people don't seek help with things until they feel overwhelmed. You need to redefine help so you can learn to see it.

Put that together with understanding the value of time and you recognize the value of the feedback you’re getting. Now you can see the help around you and because you value the time you spend with the world around you, you start to understand how you can use that help. Once you're there, you start to break these big decisions down into a series of outcomes that inform the next decision, which is really just another outcome. Big decisions will start looking like a series of small ones and they become these flexible ideas that are driving you towards your desired outcome. Finally, you turn all that into actions designed to impact your environment in a positive way and that in turn will help to inform your move towards the next outcome. 

Let's take one of your questions: Is this marketing strategy the right move?

This isn't a decision. It isn't about being right or wrong, the answer is in the outcomes you're getting and how you use them. You're thinking of this in finite, linear terms. If I do this and it doesn't get what we want, we've failed, it's the wrong move. No. It isn't. Because while you didn't get your desired outcome, you got some kind of outcome - because you did it, it happened. That tells you something that you can apply to make a change - see challenges from a place of flexibility and you'll start seeing the solutions earlier. When something isn't working, you evaluate and adjust, then move forward, then again, then again, then again. Each step moves you closer to something and eventually your desired outcomes change or maybe you realize that you aren't good at marketing and yes, that helps inform whether you bring on a consultant and where that consultant needs to specialize... and so on. 

If you want to ditch decision making fatigue, I would challenge you to consider changing your relationship with decision making. Reach out to me at scott@workhappier.ca and we'll explore it together.

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Scott works alongside his clients as a micro-mentor, coach and personal career consultant building lasting solutions to all sorts of work problems. He applies his professional expertise to his life experience and the result is that he's always exactly where he wants to be. He'd love to hear your story.